"Take an action each day that alleviates suffering in the world. Bring light into darkness."
-Angeles Arrien

Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished:
If you're alive, it isn't.
--- Richard Bach

I have come to realize more and more that the greatest disease and the greatest suffering is to be unwanted, unloved, uncared for, to be shunned by everybody, to be just nobody [to no one]
--Mother Teresa

We were not separated at your birth.
It was the moment at which we began our journey toward each other
-Nancy McGuire Roche

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

48 hours as a family

Sorry to keep you all waiting. This is the first time in 48 hours I have had a second to write. I barely got that picture on yesterday.
I am trying to get the babies on the same schedule. This is the first time in the past 2 days where they are actually sleeping at the same time. They have had the totally opposite schedules. They have not been sleeping very well at all. Up 3-4 times a night and both at different times. Naps have also been very short.

The G&R was one of the most emotional things I have ever done. Very hard with the birth parents there. I am not prepared to talk about that right now. I will give you details later when I have digested it. Just know it is a very hard, emotionally draining day. No matter how hard you plan nothing goes as planned and you never have enough time. That first time seeing the babies was magical to say the least. So many emotions all rolled into one. So much joy and at the same time so much sadness. No way on this earth to prepare for such a thing.

The babies are great. He has definitely been hugged and cuddled and pampered more then her. He has a terrible ear infection. We suspect his eardrum may have ruptured. He has a very thick mucus draining out of his ear. We are treating him and the infection seems to be getting better. We are not sure how it is affecting his personality. We also could not find the formula they said the babies got at the orphanage so we got the most recommended kind. He does not seem to be adjusting well to it. He is very gassy and cranky since we switched. We just found out from Kim tonight the correct formula they use and I am switching him back to see if that calms him down.
I never would have thought it would be this hard to come into a babies life at 7 months. When you have a newborn you grow together and at the same time you get to learn the babies likes and dislikes just as they are starting to learn what they like and dislike. Problem is my babies already know what they like and dislike but I have no idea. They can not tell me . It is like a guessing game. There are so many things I do not know about them. When they cry I am not sure how to comfort them. I try what I know but I am not sure if it is what they like best. We are all starting to get used to each other. It is a lot harder then I thought or imagined.

Our Daughter is a very good baby. She is content most of the time and very easy going. I feel bad because she is not being held by me as much as my son because he demands more attention. He wants to be held and walked around all the time. He definitely seemed to be mourning yesterday. We feel so bad for him. We are doing our best to help him adjust.

They both love the sling. Problem is they both love to be in Mommy's sling and I can only hold 1 at a time. They get jealous and mad when they see the other one in the sling. We went and got a double stroller today. They both seem to enjoy it and it helps them sit up better.

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