"Take an action each day that alleviates suffering in the world. Bring light into darkness."
-Angeles Arrien

Here is the test to find whether your mission on earth is finished:
If you're alive, it isn't.
--- Richard Bach

I have come to realize more and more that the greatest disease and the greatest suffering is to be unwanted, unloved, uncared for, to be shunned by everybody, to be just nobody [to no one]
--Mother Teresa

We were not separated at your birth.
It was the moment at which we began our journey toward each other
-Nancy McGuire Roche

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Happy 1st Birthday

Meliah and Khai had their first Birthday on Saturday March 29th. I can not believe my babies are 1. In so many ways they have come a long way in the past 5 months. It seems like yesterday we were in Vietnam picking them up. These past 5 months have gone by lightning fast. I think because I am so busy every second of the day. I don't think I am ready for them to move on to the toddler stage. Nobody really understands. When people see them they look like 12 month old toddlers but in my mind they are like 5 month old babies. I am still in that early mommy hood period. I still feel like a NEW Mommy. I want to shout to the world "Look at my NEW babies!!". Meliah is an enabler; she would let me hold her in my lap and cuddle from sun up to sundown and all night long, like a newborn baby, if I allowed her to. This would not do much for her growth and development but Mommy sure would love it.

Their first Birthday was a range of emotions for me. I was so excited it was their first Birthday but I also felt a wave of sadness wash over me every time I thought of it. With my Bio kids I always find myself recalling their birth on their Birthdays. It is my first instinct. I do it without thinking. Out of instinct and habit, When I searched my memory for Melih and Khai's birth nothing was there. At first I wondered why I could not recall and then I remembered they are adopted. It makes me so sad I did not see them enter this world. I knew this fact before I adopted but never thought it would bother me this much. I love them so much and want to have experienced every second of their lives. I hate that there are pieces of my children's lives I know nothing about. I probably will never know. I know this must sound so strange but I just don't ever think of them any different from my Bio kids. Not for one second of the day. It never runs through my mind except when we get the constant "Are they Twins? Did you get them from China??" question. I always think "How do they know they were adopted?". Then I remember DUHH? Your a family of Blonde hair and blue eyes with 2 Asian children who look nothing like any of you. When I look at them I do not even notice they are Asian anymore. It does not even occur to me.

Below is a slide show of their Birthday. We spent about 5 hours at a family play center. All 7 of us went. It was a big deal for the older kids to come along. We had a few family members with little kids meet us there. Then later that evening we had a cake with some family members.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I was one of your blog lurker last year. till you went PW, glad you are blogging again, your babies are so precious, with lovely features, love to see their different facial expressions, thank you for sharing, i am from VN, and I love to read about all VN adoption blogs, such meaningful journeys with much loves, and joys, which words can not say it all. Happy Birthday babies, don't grow up too fast. M Lam, halonh8@yahoo.com